When I asked on social media for things people wanted to see blog posts on, I was surprised by this request. People wanted to hear about our blended family. For me it isn’t the typical blended family. We are no Brady Bunch.
How are we a blended family? Both Scott and I were married before, got divorced (the same year, coincidentally) and found each other a few years after our first marriages were over. Scott didn’t have children, but he will tell you his dog is his first child. I had two children from my first marriage.
When Scott and I were dating he said that he had the idea that he may get remarried to someone with kids. I was happy to hear that! I come with two. Right after we got married I was ready to try for a baby of our own. And, thankfully, we were blessed with Claire, two and half years later Oliver joined us. While I don’t know about blending yours and mine, I know how to blend all of us.
What has worked for us:
- Scott parents my older kids as if they are his own.
- We all watch out for each other.
- Courtney and Alex were able to pick out things for the new siblings before they were born.
- Courtney and Alex each got to “meet” their newest sibling before anyone else.
- We all work together on household duties.
- Scott’s family welcomed Courtney and Alex as their own.
- *We make sure that Courtney and Alex still have communication with their Father.
- We don’t talk bad about the other’s previous spouse.
*Our situation is a little bit out of the ordinary because their dad lives out of the USA and they don’t get to see him very much.
I could have stopped the list after the first point. Scott is a parent to Courtney and Alex. He cheers them on, brags them up, teaches them kindly, and loves them with his whole heart. Without all that he does, we wouldn’t be able to make this work. But he is the one who holds it all together. I couldn’t have picked a better bonus parent for my children!